Tag Archive for i love new york

Ode to Slush

 

The world has ice, the world has snow,

But in our hearts, New Yorkers know

That when our snow is really lush

We next will have our magic slush.

 

When blocked-up drain makes sudden lake

Into which you plunge each step you take,

When just the slightest passing push

Slides you down right into the mush,

 

When taxis splash your pants all wet

Real New Yorkers never fret.

We do not fear the mugger’s cosh:

They don’t come out into the slosh.

 

Un-picked-up dog poop is froze;

You stay parked whichever side you chose;

As long as you’ve got bags of cash

You’ll score Hamilton tickets in a flash.

 

So celebrate these happy times

And do not wish for milder climes.

You do not need to find a cush–

ion for your tender tush.

 

Just grab a walker’s multi-leash

And do not stop when he says, “Sheesh!”

And now, with dogs since you are flush,

Order your new team to “Mush!”

Ten thousand steps you soon will crush

As you traverse our New York slush.

 

I Love New York

Stopped in my local deli last night on the way back from the Rancho.  Young couple at the counter buying coffee.  Counter guy I’ve never seen before, young, big grin, trendy glasses, says to man, “Mind if I give your girlfriend a compliment?”  Man says go ahead.  Counter guy turns to woman and says,  “Nice ass!”  Woman turns bright red, giggles.  Man is stuck for a second, then says, “She loves to hear that.” Woman slaps him on the arm. They leave, her still giggling. I say to counter guy, “That may not have been what either of them was expecting.” Counter guy laughs and says, “Bet the sex will be better tonight.” “Oh,”  I say, “that was altruistic?” “Yeah,” says he. “That’s what I do, travel around the world making sure everyone has great sex.”

I love New York.

 

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I Love New York

On my corner the NYPD has put up a temporary cell tower for  the Gay Pride Parade. It’s been up all week but I only saw the No Parking signs today. The photo’s not great; the top sign’s white and the bottom one’s blue. There’s no question it’s a deliberately-made rainbow.

I love New York.

 

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I Love New York

Got to the corner at the highway this morning, waited for the light to change. When it did each of the three cars that rolled up to the crosswalk was a black Mercedes, one SUV flanked by two sedans. What jumped into my mind was this.

I love New York.

I Love New York

Although currently in Wisconsin, I could not resist letting you in on this. And I don’t want to see them becoming the butt of jokes.

I love New York.

I Love New York

Duke Riley, an artist, has trained 2,000 pigeons to fly with lights on their ankles (did you know pigeons had ankles?) as an art event at the Brooklyn Navy Yard. Click on the link; it’s very cool. I love New York.

I Love New York

A restaurant called Caliente Cab Company, which has been on the corner of Bleecker and Sixth for decades, has a giant foaming Margarita in a golden cup on its facade. Apparently the Margarita has recently been attracting pigeons. Management has installed a robotic owl to scare them away. Apparently it doesn’t work.

I love New York.

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I love New York

Best sight on the subway today. The rings, the bling, the hat, the shades, and the Rubik’s Cube. He didn’t put it down all the way uptown. I love New York.

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I love New York

Plumbers in and out for days. Latino guys, one speaks a little English, one almost none. I speak just enough Spanish to follow along. Little-English guy explains to no-English guy what he wants to do, in Spanish of course. Gets a confused look. Re-explains, and to check that no-English guy gets it, he asks him, “Capice?”

“Capice?” I ask.

“Sí, like the Mafia, I ask him does he capice.” Little-English guy presses his finger to the side of his nose.

No-English guy presses his finger to the side of his nose, too, nods solemnly.

I do the same.

I love New York.

I Love New York

Construction site coffee break.

Hardhat #1 takes out cigarettes.  “Hey,”  he says to Hardhat #2, already smoking.  “You got a light?”

Hardhat #2 takes out matchbook, strikes match, holds it out, lights Hardhat #1’s smoke.  “Thanks,”  says Hardhat #1.

Hardhat #2 shakes match out, claps Hardhat #1 on the back.  “For you, buddy, I’d burn this whole fucking building down.”

I love New York.